There once was a lady very fat
She took up the state of Texas when she sat
Her Twinkies she ordered by the pound
Just to make her even more round
She was a walking monument, no lie
She was the largest skyscraper to touch the sky
When people saw her they made a big fuss
Yelling at her to keep it in the circus
On top of her lard she didn’t wear diamonds or fur
She instead was Goodwill’s biggest customer
She never owned a pet because she knew if she did
She would have squashed it with her fat and thought it had hid
She was once asked for a role on Jerry Springer
She refused at first but was then offered a Zinger
She was on there as a fat over-weighted Twinkie eater
But soon ended up being the whole packs leader
When she would pass on the street the hicks and the bums
Their kids would say, “Oh no run Ma here it comes!”
One time she was down there in Cancun
And one of the locals thought she was an escaped Baboon
She’s bigger than you think, we’re inside her right now
I’m talking elephant size huge not just a cow
One day she fell in love, but she broke it
For weeks Cupid had a really big fit
When she died she wasn’t buried six feet under
She was placed in a museum for all to wonder